The Academic’s Prayer
Dear Search Committee,
Having been footnoted
from here to McNeese State, I proffer my CV.
For years I edited the Journal of Diacritical
Uncertainty and know my regression curves
and data collection techniques. I once believed—
way back, before I discovered Heisenberg,
fractals, Chaos Theory, when I was a boy
with a talent for unpacking the latent meanings
of See Spot Run and could quote delectable bits
of Stevens. Make me tenure-track. I can explain:
the streaking incident was after seven beers.
I’ve leered a little at first-years. Provost of Mercy,
annotate me, lead me to sources , pray for me
now, and in the office hour of my death.
“The Academic’s Prayer” first appeared in Pleiades.